It's pretty sad when you consider making an appointment to see a psychiatrist just to have someone to talk to in person.
I wish I could explain this "need" I have for having "stuff" around me, as my darling husband calls it. I don't know why I need it, but I do. I recently went back and visited our old turf in Kansas City, and I have to say that as I pulled off the interstate at our old exit, I immediately felt myself relax. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief as I glanced around at all of the familiar places...
Kohl's
Best Buy
Target
Buffalo Wild Wings
Chili's
TJ Maxx
Texas Roadhouse
...and I felt "at home" again. So, why does seeing these places energize me? It's not like I frequented them daily.
I'm a people-person. I always have been. I don't like to be alone. Not that I can't be alone or that I don't enjoy alone time once in a while, but I need to talk and listen. I need to have conversations. My poor husband can't understand this need I have. He tried, bless his heart, to suggest things for me to do, many of which involved solitude and nature...two of my least favorite things. I love parts of nature. I love all things furry and feathery. I also love the water. Too bad that in a town of a whopping 2.4 square miles of land, there's only .04 square miles of water. I can't even begin to tell you how thrilled I was to find out that the person who owns the land directly behind us is building (making? installing? producing?)...putting in a 2-3 acre, fully-stocked fishing lake. Yes, please!
As happy as that makes me, and as much as I do enjoy fishing (well, besides actually baiting the hook and taking the fish off of the hook), it still does nothing to satisfy my social cravings.
So, why do I feel like I can breathe again whenever I see shopping centers? It's certainly not because I love shopping. I actually hate shopping. Yes, I am woman; I hate shopping. As my sister explained it to me, "stuff"=people=not alone.
Now that makes sense. I hate being alone. It's not that I can't ever be alone. I do enjoy spending time by myself, but when the only person I talk to 24/7 is my little stinkbug, it can get pretty lonely. :(
My darling husband said to me last night, "You're only a 40 minute drive from the mall. If you left first thing in the morning, you could be there before it even opens!" Um, somehow he's missing the point, and I'm not really sure how to explain it to him. I don't want to have to drive 40 minutes to get back to civilization. In this day and age, nobody should have to drive 40 minutes just to get to the land of the living. Unless, of course, they're into that sort of thing, which brings me back to my 1st blog post on here in which I questioned the allure of small-town life.
A glimmer of hope...
My darling husband just emailed to tell me that he has to work in Kansas City the week of labor day. Kansas City=civilization=happy Molly.
I wish I could explain this "need" I have for having "stuff" around me, as my darling husband calls it. I don't know why I need it, but I do. I recently went back and visited our old turf in Kansas City, and I have to say that as I pulled off the interstate at our old exit, I immediately felt myself relax. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief as I glanced around at all of the familiar places...
Kohl's
Best Buy
Target
Buffalo Wild Wings
Chili's
TJ Maxx
Texas Roadhouse
...and I felt "at home" again. So, why does seeing these places energize me? It's not like I frequented them daily.
I'm a people-person. I always have been. I don't like to be alone. Not that I can't be alone or that I don't enjoy alone time once in a while, but I need to talk and listen. I need to have conversations. My poor husband can't understand this need I have. He tried, bless his heart, to suggest things for me to do, many of which involved solitude and nature...two of my least favorite things. I love parts of nature. I love all things furry and feathery. I also love the water. Too bad that in a town of a whopping 2.4 square miles of land, there's only .04 square miles of water. I can't even begin to tell you how thrilled I was to find out that the person who owns the land directly behind us is building (making? installing? producing?)...putting in a 2-3 acre, fully-stocked fishing lake. Yes, please!
As happy as that makes me, and as much as I do enjoy fishing (well, besides actually baiting the hook and taking the fish off of the hook), it still does nothing to satisfy my social cravings.
So, why do I feel like I can breathe again whenever I see shopping centers? It's certainly not because I love shopping. I actually hate shopping. Yes, I am woman; I hate shopping. As my sister explained it to me, "stuff"=people=not alone.
Now that makes sense. I hate being alone. It's not that I can't ever be alone. I do enjoy spending time by myself, but when the only person I talk to 24/7 is my little stinkbug, it can get pretty lonely. :(
My darling husband said to me last night, "You're only a 40 minute drive from the mall. If you left first thing in the morning, you could be there before it even opens!" Um, somehow he's missing the point, and I'm not really sure how to explain it to him. I don't want to have to drive 40 minutes to get back to civilization. In this day and age, nobody should have to drive 40 minutes just to get to the land of the living. Unless, of course, they're into that sort of thing, which brings me back to my 1st blog post on here in which I questioned the allure of small-town life.
A glimmer of hope...
My darling husband just emailed to tell me that he has to work in Kansas City the week of labor day. Kansas City=civilization=happy Molly.